Tangled In Wedgies

I just needed to look through the extra closet to see if my winter pants were in there, but I couldn't find them. The seasonal clothes must have been moved already, and I didn't see them, but when I closed the door, my panties got stuck! I thought I had the key for the door, but it's jammed. I can't seem to pull them out. Pulling at my panties does nothing, but only stretches them out harder. I yank and shimmy, attempting to pull my panties out, but they're stuck stuck. A strong hard pull manages to fling the door open, but it smacks against my leg and slams shut again, with my panties jamming the lock. The harder I pull, the deeper my wedgie goes! My bottom! I struggle and try to get my panties out of the door, but it's stuck and my struggling is useless. My wedgie gets deeper the harder I wiggle, but my struggling manages to tangle my panties in a terrible twist. I pull, and topple over, falling into a heap with my ankles in the air wrapped around my panties in knots. I'm stuck! Please help get me out of this mega atomic wedgie!